On Smoking

ZERO-TOLERANCE POLICY

We have a zero-tolerance policy on smoking. Cancer sticks are not sold here. Tobacco addicts are kindly requested get your daily nicotine fix elsewhere.

We forbid the smoking of tobacco (cigarettes, pipes, cigars, cigarellos or whatever else you wish to call those cancer-sticks) on our premises. If you wish to poison your wife and children in the comfort of your own home, that is your business.

Adult smokers are kindly requested to extinguish their cigarettes before entering the premises. And no, we do NOT enjoy picking up your cigarette butts from our floor, so please do that yourself or set a good example to your children by using the wastebasket provided.

Smokers under 18 or in school uniform will be detained and handed over to the police. (Your mother can bail you out after you have spent a night in the Police lock-up in your underwear.)

Ladies, smoking is so not kewl. Have you kissed an ashtray before? Right.

Copyright 2003-2006 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice