Chapter 2. Balance is for the meek
from Azizi Ali's latest book "mXe! five keys to become an Extreme Millionaire"
Balance.
Now that's a word that everyone would nod their heads to.
Everyone--rich, poor, young, old, black, brown, white, tall, short and
all around the world--would agree that balance is a magical word.
"We must strive for balance," shouts the politician. "Man must have
balance in his life," echoes the religious leaders. "We must all lead
a balanced life," come yet another agreement from the health gurus.
"Balance is the key to life," write authors from different shores.
In other words, we must all eat moderately, dress moderately, work
moderately, party moderately, sleep moderately, exercise moderately
and in short, live moderately. To which I will say, "What a load of
crap!"
Folks, nobody ever achieved anything significant in this world by
being moderate. Anyone who has rocked the world did so by doing
something to an extreme. Tiger Woods became the youngest number one
golfer in the world at the age of twenty one. But he did not start
playing golf at twenty; he's been playing golf since he was three
years old. That's not moderate, that's extreme. Genghis Khan did not
conquer half the world by being moderate; he slaughtered all who got
in his way. So did Alexander the Great. (Alexander was not called
Great by being moderate.) These people did things to an extreme,
that's why they're the stuff legends are made of. The Prophet Muhammad
was not balanced; he was extreme in his view of a single God when
everyone else was praying to idols. Jesus was not balanced; he was
extreme in his view of forgiveness even when the Roman soldiers were
putting him on the cross. (I will give more example of extremists in
this book as we go along.)
In other words, balance is for the average folks. Balance is for the
meek. If you want to have an average job, average house, average life
and be a part of the background, then do everything moderately. A
little bit of this and a little bit of that. Blend in with the balanced crowd,
don't stick out your neck and never, ever be different from the rest.
I assure you that you will be balanced. And average.
But if you want to be a winner (in anything), folks, you have to be an
extremist. If you want to achieve something significant in your life,
you have to be an extremist. To truly live life, you cannot be balanced,
you have to do things to an extreme degree. To be a world champion
in any sport or anything, you have to practice extremely. And to build
serious wealth, you have to go all the way. You cannot do things half-
heartedly, half measure or half way. You have to pull out all the stops
and go all the way.
A short look at history
For a long time, like most people, I too assumed that everything had
been the same since time immemorial. Sure, there were inventions and
technological advances but people had thought pretty much the same
thoughts as their forefathers. Boy, was I wrong!
The more I studied history, the more I learnt that man has changed
significantly from his forefathers. And not only in the physical sense
but more importantly, in his thinking.
Today, the idea of improving oneself is but a given. You are expected
to do all you can to improve your station in life. But would you be
surprised if I told you that this is a new idea?
For thousands of years, mankind had been doing things for the
community. You work hard yes, not to move ahead, but to maintain your
place in life and therefore society. If your grandfather was a farmer,
you and your children will spend your lives down at the farms. If they
were ironmongers instead, that's what you and your children will be
doing. This is how it was to the ancient Greeks, Romans, Arabs,
Egyptians, and even to the majority of Eastern civilizations. So the
concept of "bettering yourself" or "getting ahead" was as alien as,
well, an alien from a different planet. Folks would stare at you in
disbelief if you ever raised such radical thoughts.
While running a business was as old as mankind, to do so for profit,
gain and self advancement was a sure way of getting yourself branded
as a disciple of the Devil. You'd be kicked out of the community in a
hurry. Banking, charging interest and lending money were pretty much
X-rated activities and people only did them behind shadowy curtains.
Even in the Middle Ages, the Church taught that no self respecting
Christians ought to be merchants because merchants were a blight to
society.
Only in the late 1700s, views began to change. This was kick started
by the publication of The Wealth of Nations by the Scottish
economist Adam Smith in 1776. (If the year sounds familiar, it is the
year when America gained independence from the British.) The world
opened up for businesses, markets cropped up and trade between nations
was brisk. Merchants started to make real money while bankers came out
of the closet to lend us money and charge us interest.
Today, the world revolves around money. Banking is a world wide
phenomenon and bankers are esteemed members of society. Few would
start a business without having profit as the driving motive. In fact,
extremely successful businessmen are treated like celebrities, rock
stars and world leaders. Just look at Bill Gates. He is treated like a
world leader everywhere he goes. Even Presidents and Prime Ministers
want to meet him! All the guy does is sell software (by the
gazillions)!
Box - Banking
The model for the first bank and saving institution was developed by
Reverend Henry Duncan when he established the Parish Bank Friendly
Society of Ruthwell in Scotland in 1810.
Though men had been saving and investing their money throughout the
centuries, it had always been done for the community. The banking
operation was based on the principle of charity; to help out a
neighbour in distress or for the benefit of the community as a whole.
However, Dr. Duncan's bank was different. It was the first bank to
provide the means for an individual to save money for his own benefit.
Dr. Duncan wanted to encourage self-reliance, independence, individual
pride and also dignity. And his bank provided the means for an
individual to do exactly that--save money for one's own future.
So as you can imagine, the idea of saving money for one's own future
and gain was something totally radical. The thought back then was the
collapse of society if everybody was allowed to make personal gains.
The infamous question of "what would happen if everyone did the same
thing?" must have been raised over and over again.
As it turned out, it was precisely because everyone did the same
thing--worked hard for personal gain--that the world exploded as it
did in the early 1800s.
Bankers have certainly come very far in such a short time. Today, they
rule the world.
But some things remain the same. Like a hard habit to break, the big
no-no word today is "extreme". Despite the glaring signs and clues
that prove otherwise (like the ones mentioned earlier), a lot of
people are still touting the benefits of being balanced. Despite the
thousands of people rocking the world by being extreme, a lot of
people are sticking with balance. So much so that if you mention that
you are an extremist, most people would stare at you with their mouths
wide open. A few would think that you have gone off your rockers while
some others would have been long gone, bolting through the door as
soon as you mention the dreaded E word. You'd be branded a lunatic or
something even worse.
The definition problem
The problem with the word "extreme" is that it is being defined and
used mostly in the negative sense. An extremist is someone who is off
the wall, not all there, dangerous and yes, someone who is to be
feared. The current obvious poster (and fall) guy is a Muslim
extremist. If there is one thing that strikes fear into western
hearts, it is a Muslim extremist, who is pictured as a guy who would
think nothing of blowing himself up.
The reality is that the guys who are blowing themselves up are doing
it for revenge, for hatred, for anger and for a thousand other
reasons, but certainly not for Islam. Islam doesn't dictate true
believers to blow themselves and others up.
But of course, it is a convenient attack. It is so much easier to
blame everything on extremists. Instead of trying to find the reasons
why young men are blowing themselves up, they push it all aside with
one word--extremist. Clean, easy and convenient.
Which is a tragedy in more ways than one.
SIDEBAR
"Don't wish it were easier, wish you were better. Don't wish for
fewer problems, wish for more skills. Don't wish for less of a
challenge, wish for more wisdom."
Jim Rohn
A short history of flying
In the early days of flight, the authorities discovered that many of
the air crashes were due to design or mechanical faults. This was not
surprising considering the industry was in the beginning stages.
However, all these were quickly addressed and rectified. Now while the
number of crashes dropped, it did not go down as many as expected. The
investigators soon found another major reason for the crashes--the
pilots themselves. A crash that was attributed to a mistake by the
pilot was termed as "pilot error" and the case was closed. Perhaps the
thinking back then was, "pilot error" was human error and was
therefore unavoidable. So the moment the words "pilot error" came up,
the case would be closed.
Easy work for the authorities, investigators, airlines, management,
air traffic control and the flight crew themselves. Label it "pilot
error", case closed and we can all go back to our daily existence.
While it did make things easy, it did not solve the problem.
It took some years before someone realised that hey, maybe we should
look more into "pilot error". For the first time, questions were being
asked: what led to the pilot making the error? Was he having personal
problems? Was he tired? Or was he having financial problems? And most
important of all, what can we do to reduce and eliminate pilot errors?
From then onwards, the whole concept changed.
And the moment the aviation industry began to address this, the number
of crashes, near crashes and incidents dropped again. As a result,
today, flying is one of the safest, if not the safest, mode of
transportation in the world.
Likewise, a similar result would arise if we start to use the word
extreme for what it really is instead of lumping it with all the
negative things on this planet. Instead of thinking it as something
bad, evil and negative, we could re-brand it as something positive,
which it is. We could use it to spur us to greater heights and lead
extraordinary lives.
When extreme is the only solution
As mentioned in the beginning of this book, the definition of extreme
is "far from what is usual or conventional" or "an excessive degree;
immoderate". This means that extreme does not have to be negative. In
fact, as you can see, there is no negative connotation in the
definition at all.
In other words, extreme can be, well, extremely positive!
Now some of you may be surprised but despite the unanimous echo the
world over for moderation, there are areas where you want it to
be taken to the extreme.
"What do you mean, Azizi?"
Well, would you want your kids to be truthful only moderately? Would
you want to have anything to do with folks who are moderately honest?
Would you do business with people who are moderately fair? Would you
want to be on the operating table of a surgeon who is moderately
successful? Would you want the air traffic controllers to be only
moderate in doing their job?
In the last question alone, a 99.9% success rate would still mean an
air crash with catastrophic loss of lives every day. For example,
O'Hare International Airport in Chicago, which is one the busiest
airports in the world, handled over 920,000 aircraft movements in 2002
alone. A 0.1% failure rate will still see 920 crashes per year or 2.5
crashes a day! Would you be happy with that? Remember that is a 0.1%
failure rate, which is well above what most people would term as
moderation. The obvious answer is no. You want everyone in the
aviation industry--air traffic controllers, pilots, engineers,
everyone--to maintain a 100% success rate. All the time.
So the answer to all of the above questions is "no". You do not want
moderation in any of the above situation. You want them to be extreme.
You want your children to tell the truth all the time, not some of the
time and not in moderation. You want to do business with people who
are fair and honest all the time, not some of the time. You want
surgeons who are successful in all their operations and you certainly
want a hundred percent success rate in air traffic control. Only
extreme counts and there is no other acceptable answer.
So while moderation is a fine way to live life, don't take moderation
to an extreme! In other words, you have to be an extremist in some
areas, preferable the ones that make a major difference in your
life--happiness, health, wealth and family being just four of them.
The good news is that if you are still reading these pages, then you
are halfway through to become an extremist yourself!
Edited for clarity by Azlan Adnan.
Sunday, December 12, 2004
Gunung Datok Rembau
You're invited to join the d'Peak Toastmasters Club members in climbing Gunung Datok Rembau.
d'Peak Toastmasters Club meeting on the d'Peak of Gunung Datok Rembau, Negri Sembilan.
Day Trip on Sunday, 12th Dec 2004. Easy Climb.
Itinerary
6.30 am: Breakfast while waiting, at our "usual" collection station at de Mamak Shop below Maluri LRT bridge on the same side of Jaya Jusco Taman Maluri, Jalan Cheras.Here you can also pack your Lunch for the climb. Free car parking point for Car pooling. Members can also come by LRT.
7.00 am: Leave for Rembau via Seremban Highway to Pedas/Rembau.
8.30 am: Easy climb from Waterfall Base up to peak 884 metres.
11.00 to 11.30 am: Lunch Break at the Peak
11.30 to 12.30 pm: TM Meeting at two man-made Platforms in a cool environment!
2.30 pm: Back to base to wash up at Waterfall.
3.30 pm: journey back to KL
4.30 pm plus: Back at Maluri Station for Tea.
Bring along Back Pack to carry Water, Food. A good pair of Trekking shoes, Trekking wear, Rain wear, spare clothing/slippers for change. Swimming wear to bathe at Waterfall.
The club was formed to have the pleasure and leisure of Public Speaking via it's proven program, now up on peaks of mountains, waterfalls using Wheel Drive vehicles, inside caves and other summits both indoor and outdoor!
Ultimate ain is to train, and train with the goal of conducting a Toastmaster Meeting up Gunung Kinabalu and Mount Kilimanjaro, Tanzania, the tallest Peak in the continent of Africa!
"A journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step."
~ Confucius
So the ultimate climb will be achieved by training on easier peaks! Meetings are conducted twice monthly on gradually higher and higher summits.
Dare to take up the challenge?
All of you are invited as guests! If you are up to the task, join us!
Tell email your friends about this project.
Interested? Suggestions? Comments? Questions?
Contact:
Kaynis Chong
kaynis@gmail.com
Mobile 019-329 0288
Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice
Saturday, December 11, 2004
African Scam ~ Arwork Mokar
BEWARE OF THIS SCAM
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: arworkmokar@excite.co.uk, arworkmokar@fsmail.net
Date: Fri, 10 Dec 2004 01:15:47 +0100
Subject: BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY
To: basheer@malaysianyellowpages.net
MR ARWORK MOKAR
NNPC TOWERS
DELTA STATE
Hello, Good day,
I am the Chairman of the Contract Award Committee, Federal Ministry
of Petroleum Resources, Nigeria I am in search of an agent to assist
us in the transfer of (US$50,4M) FIFTY MILLION, FOUR HUNDRED THOUSAND
UNITED STATES DOLLARS. And subsequent investment in properties in your
country.You will be required to:
(1) Assist in the transfer of the said sum
(2) Advise on lucrative areas for investment
(3) Assist us in purchase of properties.
If you decide to render your service to us in this regard, 30% of the
total sum will be offerred to you. Pls reply to my private
email:(arworkmokar@fsmail.net)
Respectfully,
MR ARWORK MOKAR
Chairman Contract Award Committee {CCAC}
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: arworkmokar@excite.co.uk, arworkmokar@fsmail.net
Date: Fri, 10 Dec 2004 01:15:47 +0100
Subject: BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY
To: basheer@malaysianyellowpages.net
MR ARWORK MOKAR
NNPC TOWERS
DELTA STATE
Hello, Good day,
I am the Chairman of the Contract Award Committee, Federal Ministry
of Petroleum Resources, Nigeria I am in search of an agent to assist
us in the transfer of (US$50,4M) FIFTY MILLION, FOUR HUNDRED THOUSAND
UNITED STATES DOLLARS. And subsequent investment in properties in your
country.You will be required to:
(1) Assist in the transfer of the said sum
(2) Advise on lucrative areas for investment
(3) Assist us in purchase of properties.
If you decide to render your service to us in this regard, 30% of the
total sum will be offerred to you. Pls reply to my private
email:(arworkmokar@fsmail.net)
Respectfully,
MR ARWORK MOKAR
Chairman Contract Award Committee {CCAC}
African Scam ~ Marriam Taylor
BEWARE OF THIS SCAM
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Marriam Taylor
Emails:
marriam_taylor@voila.fr
marriam_taylor0003@yahoo.ca
Date: Thu, 9 Dec 2004 19:04:32 +0100
Subject: Waiting to hear from you
From Mrs. Marriam Taylor.
Rue 982 Sea Avenue opposite old Navy Camp
B/P 9618 Dakar Senegal
West Africa.
Hello Sir,
I would like to apply through this medium for your co-operation and to
secure an opportunity to invest and do joint business with you in your
country.
I have a substantial capital i honorably intend to invest in your
country into a very lucrative business venture of which you are to
advise and execute the said venture over there for the mutual benefits
of both of us.
Your able co-operation is to become my business partner in your
country and create ideas on how money will be invested,properly
managed and the type of investment after the money is transferred to
your custody with your assistance.
Meanwhile, on indication of your willingness to handle this
transaction sincerely by protecting our interests and upon your
acceptance of this proposal, I would furnish you with the full
detailed information, procedure,amount involve and mutually agree on
your percentage interest or share holding for helping me to secure the
release of the deposit and investing the money.
I shall be glad to reserve this respect and opportunity for you, if
you so desire, but do urgent you to give the matter your immediate
attention it deserves. Looking forward to your earliest reply true my
private Email: marriam_taylor@voila.fr
Your's Truly,
Mrs. Marriam Taylor.
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Marriam Taylor
Emails:
marriam_taylor@voila.fr
marriam_taylor0003@yahoo.ca
Date: Thu, 9 Dec 2004 19:04:32 +0100
Subject: Waiting to hear from you
From Mrs. Marriam Taylor.
Rue 982 Sea Avenue opposite old Navy Camp
B/P 9618 Dakar Senegal
West Africa.
Hello Sir,
I would like to apply through this medium for your co-operation and to
secure an opportunity to invest and do joint business with you in your
country.
I have a substantial capital i honorably intend to invest in your
country into a very lucrative business venture of which you are to
advise and execute the said venture over there for the mutual benefits
of both of us.
Your able co-operation is to become my business partner in your
country and create ideas on how money will be invested,properly
managed and the type of investment after the money is transferred to
your custody with your assistance.
Meanwhile, on indication of your willingness to handle this
transaction sincerely by protecting our interests and upon your
acceptance of this proposal, I would furnish you with the full
detailed information, procedure,amount involve and mutually agree on
your percentage interest or share holding for helping me to secure the
release of the deposit and investing the money.
I shall be glad to reserve this respect and opportunity for you, if
you so desire, but do urgent you to give the matter your immediate
attention it deserves. Looking forward to your earliest reply true my
private Email: marriam_taylor@voila.fr
Your's Truly,
Mrs. Marriam Taylor.
Wednesday, December 08, 2004
Azizi Ali's Property Newsletter
------------------------------------------------------------
MILLIONAIRESPLANET EZINE
money . success . freedom
Dec 2004 Issue #28
------------------------------------------------------------
Welcome to the latest issue of
"MILLIONAIRESPLANET EZINE"
------------------------------------------------------------
IN THIS ISSUE
------------------------------------------------------------
1. Feature Article
2. Quote of the Month
3. Your Question Answered
4. Special Offers
5. New Books by Azizi Ali
6. Disclaimers
------------------------------------------------------------
1. FEATURE ARTICLE: Property Jumbo Answer (Session 2)
------------------------------------------------------------
Since it proved to be a hot thing, I'm answering more
property investment related questions this month.
As usual, the questions are presented the way they came in
- broken English, wrong grammar and all.
Q1: I bought your book "How to Become a Property
Millionaire". It's a fantastic book and I want to put to
good use my knowledge gained from your book. However, I
would really appreciate if you can enlighten me as how to
discern the market price of an auctioned property as
against the reserve price stated in the proclamation of sale.
Thanks.
A1: A good rough guide is the selling price of similar
houses in the same area. For example, if a neighboring
house sold for RM200k last month, the price of the auctioned
property should not be more than that. Of course, if you
want a more exact figure, hire a valuer.
Q2: 1. Is it true that I will be charged RGPT, i.e. 30%
from profit? I heard that for selling a 1st house, owner
will be exempted on this RGPT.
2. Are there any tax that I have to pay, i.e. sales
tax, government tax, etc.?
3. For the past 3 years, I fell in love with
properties. Any advice?
A2: 1. The RGPT is calculated on a sliding scale,
depending on the time period you owned it. The scale starts
from 30% for the first 2 years and drops to 0% after 5 years.
(Please refer to pg 168 of my latest bestseller "How to
Become a Property Millionaire" for the full scale).
You can get the exemption from RGPT for the first
house that you declared, which is not necessarily the first
house you actually sold. For example, it may be the third
house that you sold as you paid RPGT for the first 2 houses
that you sold. A good strategy is to get the RGPT exemption
for the property with the largest profit. This is because
we are given only one exemption a lifetime. Once taken,
it is gone forever.
2. Yes, you have to pay stamp duty on the sale.
This will be done by the lawyer handling the S & P agreement.
3. Read (and reread) my twin books on property
investment - "How to Become a Property Millionaire" and
"How to Become a Millionaire Landlord". Of course, you can
attend my property seminar as well. The next one is on
Saturday 11th December 20004. (Full details are on the
website.)
Q3: At the risk of being out-bid at an auction, I will
not only lose out on the property, but will there be any
fees incurred? Will I lose my 10% deposit?
A3: You will get back your 10% deposit should you not
win the auction. The only charge incurred is the fee you
paid to the bank for preparing the bank draft.
Q4: Great book! You're on the way (if not already) to
be the next Rich Dad of Malaysia.
One question, just an idea I have. Is it
worthwhile/legal for me to start a company and use this
company to purchase properties and collect rent before I
even own 4 residential properties? I figure this way I
could deduct a lot of the expenses like renovations as
necessities of the business and get better tax breaks.
Are there other ways other than owning 4
residential properties to consider the rent as business
income?
A4: Thank you for your kind words and support.
1. Of course you can have a company for your
property investment. You can do this anytime, even
before buying a single property. However, you will incur
added costs such as incorporation and secretarial expenses
by doing so. Therefore, make sure you are serious about
becoming a property investor first before doing this.
2. You don't need to have 4 residential properties
to be able to treat the rent as a biz income. As explained
in "How to Become a Property Millionaire" (pg 165), if you
have 2 or more shop houses, that will qualify as well.
Q5: You mentioned that banks only allow loans up to 1/3
of an individual's monthly pay for property (real estate)
loans.
Say I earn RM3000 per month. This would mean that
banks will only give a loan for a property which has a
monthly mortgage of not more than RM1000. Is it correct?
Suppose the above is correct. Now, let's say that
it will take me 20 years to service the property loan
and that my pay stays fixed at RM3000 per month for the
next 20 years. At this rate, does this mean that I cannot
buy any more property at least for the next 20 years
because my monthly pay of RM3000 is not enough for me to
take another loan from the bank (unless my pay goes up to
RM6000 – then I can take another similar loan). If this is
the case, then how can I achieve to own 5 properties in 10
years? Please help as I want to buy my first property soon.
A5: 1. Yes, banks normally allow loans up to 1/3 of
your salary. However, they will consider other consistent
source of income as well. For example, rent collected or
commission from sales or royalty from writing books.
2. If you do not have other source of income and
if your salary remained at RM3000 for the next 20 years,
your maximum loans will remain at RM1000. And you deserve
it! Even an average person's salary will increase in 20
years, what more an above average you?
Q6: I noticed that you do not recommend service
apartment as an investment. Why can't you make money from
service apartment? Please elaborate.
A6: I do not recommend service apartment because I have
never met, known or heard any individual making money
from them (developers aside)! Isn't that a good enough
reason to stay away?
Q7: I would like to congratulate you for writing
fantastic books. I first read about property investment
by Robert K. 2 years ago but wishing that a Malaysian would
write books like this. I guess my wish came true….2 months
ago I just purchase my first property in Miri, Sarawak
with an extremely very low price. I'm very excited about
getting another property but I have a few questions
that I would like to ask you, since I'm very new in this.
I'm thinking of getting into property investment as
a full time, the problem is I'm working with family so I
have no income tax.
What do I need to do? My only problem at this moment
is more to income tax, can you please advice me on this
matter?
A7: I'm not exactly certain what is it that you want
to know but here goes. You only pay income tax when
you make money. If you don't make money, or not make enough
money, or lose money, you don't pay tax.
By the way, it's only money that is the criteria
here. Whether you do it full time or part-time is immaterial.
In other words, you can remain a full time housewife,
invest in properties in your free time, and make money and
pay a little bit of tax. Life is a bed of roses!
Q8: I have obtained a loan for a property recently
bought. This said property has been rented out and
provides me an income of RM1000 per month. My loan
installment is RM950. Would like to find out:
1. Can bank mortgage interest be deducted in my
personal income tax?
2. What is the maximum amount (as in RM) that is
allowed for deduction? What are the criteria required for
a full amount of deduction?
A8: Yes, you can deduct the interest portion of the
mortgage from your income tax – all of it. For example,
if the interest portion is RM900, than you can deduct all
that. There is no other criteria except for the property
must not be the one that you are staying in.
Q9: Would like to have your advice for the followings:
1. Potential tenants
If we as a landlord have collected a down payment
from potential tenant and had agreed verbally to rent the
property out to them. However, at a later stage we realize
that they are not suitable after viewing their application
form. What can we do? Can we just refund them the down
payment without any compensation?
2. Existing tenants
If tenants continue to extend another year contract
after completing two year tenancy now has requested the
landlord to repaint the property. Are we obliged to do so?
Can we charge them the cost for the painting?
A9: 1. It depends on the agreement. Normally we would
refund their deposit and move on. If they not happy
about it, they may decide to take legal action against
you, but it takes too long, too expensive and too much
trouble. Weigh the risks and decide intelligently.
2. No, you are obliged to repaint the property
(especially if it is not in the tenancy agreement).
However, you may want to do so to maintain the appearance
(and value) of your property. Perhaps both of you (landlord
and tenant) can share the cost?
Q10: I have attended your property investment course in
Holiday Villa last year. Herewith I want to share some of
my properties investment portfolio with you.
1. I have two rental apartments in Melaka, one I
rent out to KYM (Kolej Yayasan Melaka) and the other one
to MMU (Multimedia University). Both comes with rental
agreement and managed by rental management companies.
Both are giving me a positive cash flow.
2. I also have bought one condominium in Ulu Langat
with 25 years rental contract. The contract has been legally
stamp. What should I do to ensure that the developer
fulfill their obligation to pay the rental to me for the
next 25 years? Can any legal action been taken if they do
not fulfill any of the terms in the agreement?
A10: 1. Good for you. Way to go!
2. There is nothing you can do except for taking
legal action should the other party fail to fulfill their
side of the bargain.
Oh wait, yes! There is one alternative - sell the darn property!
PS: More readers have written in to inquire about Capital
Allowance (mentioned in "How to Become a Property
Millionaire"). Since it is such a hot topic, I have
prepared a brief explanation on it, which is now on my
website. This ought to satisfy curious souls out there.
Please click on
http://www.millionairesplanet.com/art045.html
------------------------------------------------------------
2. QUOTE OF THE MONTH
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"The only thing that stands between a man and what
he wants from life is often merely the will to try
it and the faith to believe that it is possible."
* Richard M. DeVos *
------------------------------------------------------------
3. YOUR QUESTION ANSWERED
------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Not too long ago, I came across your book entitled "How
to become a Millionaire Landlord". After reading it, a spark
lit the fire to my quest for knowledge about the world
finance and earning money. I soon grabbed hold of another
book of yours, "Millionaires are From a Different Planet".
This book has educated me on personal finance.
After reading your profile, I was very much encouraged, not
just by your success in personal finances, but that you are
a pilot. You have become my role model. What I understand
from your profile is that you are a pilot, already have an
MBA from University of Bath, and most of all, and are in
control of your finance.
What I am particularly interested in is how you did all that?
A: Whatever you really, really, really, really, really wants
in life… you will do whatever it takes to get it. That's
how I always get what I want in my life. That's how anybody
who's anybody ever got anything in their lives.
Now what is it hat you really (10x) want in your life?
* HOT TIP *
Read "Die Broke"
by Stephen Pollan and Mark Levine
------------------------------------------------------------
4. SPECIAL OFFERS: Property Seminar
------------------------------------------------------------
Last call for the *number 1* property seminar in Malaysia.
Title: How to MAKE A MILLION from property investment
Date: Sat 11th Dec 2004
Time: 9 am - 6 pm
Venue: Holiday Villa, Subang Jaya
Click here to find out how you can benefit from the real
estate revolution.
http://www.millionairesplanet.com/events.html
PS: Each pax will receive a complimentary copy of Azizi's
latest best seller "How to Become a Property Millionaire".
------------------------------------------------------------
5. NEW BOOKS FROM AZIZI ALI
------------------------------------------------------------
Azizi's latest book "mXe! five keys to become an Extreme
Millionaire" will be out soon. As the title suggests, this
book is about how you can get to be a millionaire as
quickly as possible while doing the things that you love.
If you have benefited from Azizi's previous books, then you
will no doubt love this latest offering. You will find gems
inside this book, which include Azizi's own secret of
success and formula of living life.
This book is due to be published in Feb 2005. However, you
can place your order now and be the first to get this storm.
For more details, please click on:
http://www.millionairesplanet.com/pro.html
------------------------------------------------------------
6. DISCLAIMERS
------------------------------------------------------------
This e-zine is for educational purposes only. The author and
publisher specifically disclaim any responsibility for any
liability, loss or risk, personal or otherwise, which is
incurred as a consequence, directly or indirectly, of the
use and application of any of the contents of this e-zine.
------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright 2004 Azizi Ali
All rights reserved
------------------------------------------------------------
Azizi Ali
True Wealth Sdn Bhd
email: info@millionairesplanet.com
website: www.millionairesplanet.com
tel: 03-7880 1051
fax: 03-7880 8051
MILLIONAIRESPLANET EZINE
money . success . freedom
Dec 2004 Issue #28
------------------------------------------------------------
Welcome to the latest issue of
"MILLIONAIRESPLANET EZINE"
------------------------------------------------------------
IN THIS ISSUE
------------------------------------------------------------
1. Feature Article
2. Quote of the Month
3. Your Question Answered
4. Special Offers
5. New Books by Azizi Ali
6. Disclaimers
------------------------------------------------------------
1. FEATURE ARTICLE: Property Jumbo Answer (Session 2)
------------------------------------------------------------
Since it proved to be a hot thing, I'm answering more
property investment related questions this month.
As usual, the questions are presented the way they came in
- broken English, wrong grammar and all.
Q1: I bought your book "How to Become a Property
Millionaire". It's a fantastic book and I want to put to
good use my knowledge gained from your book. However, I
would really appreciate if you can enlighten me as how to
discern the market price of an auctioned property as
against the reserve price stated in the proclamation of sale.
Thanks.
A1: A good rough guide is the selling price of similar
houses in the same area. For example, if a neighboring
house sold for RM200k last month, the price of the auctioned
property should not be more than that. Of course, if you
want a more exact figure, hire a valuer.
Q2: 1. Is it true that I will be charged RGPT, i.e. 30%
from profit? I heard that for selling a 1st house, owner
will be exempted on this RGPT.
2. Are there any tax that I have to pay, i.e. sales
tax, government tax, etc.?
3. For the past 3 years, I fell in love with
properties. Any advice?
A2: 1. The RGPT is calculated on a sliding scale,
depending on the time period you owned it. The scale starts
from 30% for the first 2 years and drops to 0% after 5 years.
(Please refer to pg 168 of my latest bestseller "How to
Become a Property Millionaire" for the full scale).
You can get the exemption from RGPT for the first
house that you declared, which is not necessarily the first
house you actually sold. For example, it may be the third
house that you sold as you paid RPGT for the first 2 houses
that you sold. A good strategy is to get the RGPT exemption
for the property with the largest profit. This is because
we are given only one exemption a lifetime. Once taken,
it is gone forever.
2. Yes, you have to pay stamp duty on the sale.
This will be done by the lawyer handling the S & P agreement.
3. Read (and reread) my twin books on property
investment - "How to Become a Property Millionaire" and
"How to Become a Millionaire Landlord". Of course, you can
attend my property seminar as well. The next one is on
Saturday 11th December 20004. (Full details are on the
website.)
Q3: At the risk of being out-bid at an auction, I will
not only lose out on the property, but will there be any
fees incurred? Will I lose my 10% deposit?
A3: You will get back your 10% deposit should you not
win the auction. The only charge incurred is the fee you
paid to the bank for preparing the bank draft.
Q4: Great book! You're on the way (if not already) to
be the next Rich Dad of Malaysia.
One question, just an idea I have. Is it
worthwhile/legal for me to start a company and use this
company to purchase properties and collect rent before I
even own 4 residential properties? I figure this way I
could deduct a lot of the expenses like renovations as
necessities of the business and get better tax breaks.
Are there other ways other than owning 4
residential properties to consider the rent as business
income?
A4: Thank you for your kind words and support.
1. Of course you can have a company for your
property investment. You can do this anytime, even
before buying a single property. However, you will incur
added costs such as incorporation and secretarial expenses
by doing so. Therefore, make sure you are serious about
becoming a property investor first before doing this.
2. You don't need to have 4 residential properties
to be able to treat the rent as a biz income. As explained
in "How to Become a Property Millionaire" (pg 165), if you
have 2 or more shop houses, that will qualify as well.
Q5: You mentioned that banks only allow loans up to 1/3
of an individual's monthly pay for property (real estate)
loans.
Say I earn RM3000 per month. This would mean that
banks will only give a loan for a property which has a
monthly mortgage of not more than RM1000. Is it correct?
Suppose the above is correct. Now, let's say that
it will take me 20 years to service the property loan
and that my pay stays fixed at RM3000 per month for the
next 20 years. At this rate, does this mean that I cannot
buy any more property at least for the next 20 years
because my monthly pay of RM3000 is not enough for me to
take another loan from the bank (unless my pay goes up to
RM6000 – then I can take another similar loan). If this is
the case, then how can I achieve to own 5 properties in 10
years? Please help as I want to buy my first property soon.
A5: 1. Yes, banks normally allow loans up to 1/3 of
your salary. However, they will consider other consistent
source of income as well. For example, rent collected or
commission from sales or royalty from writing books.
2. If you do not have other source of income and
if your salary remained at RM3000 for the next 20 years,
your maximum loans will remain at RM1000. And you deserve
it! Even an average person's salary will increase in 20
years, what more an above average you?
Q6: I noticed that you do not recommend service
apartment as an investment. Why can't you make money from
service apartment? Please elaborate.
A6: I do not recommend service apartment because I have
never met, known or heard any individual making money
from them (developers aside)! Isn't that a good enough
reason to stay away?
Q7: I would like to congratulate you for writing
fantastic books. I first read about property investment
by Robert K. 2 years ago but wishing that a Malaysian would
write books like this. I guess my wish came true….2 months
ago I just purchase my first property in Miri, Sarawak
with an extremely very low price. I'm very excited about
getting another property but I have a few questions
that I would like to ask you, since I'm very new in this.
I'm thinking of getting into property investment as
a full time, the problem is I'm working with family so I
have no income tax.
What do I need to do? My only problem at this moment
is more to income tax, can you please advice me on this
matter?
A7: I'm not exactly certain what is it that you want
to know but here goes. You only pay income tax when
you make money. If you don't make money, or not make enough
money, or lose money, you don't pay tax.
By the way, it's only money that is the criteria
here. Whether you do it full time or part-time is immaterial.
In other words, you can remain a full time housewife,
invest in properties in your free time, and make money and
pay a little bit of tax. Life is a bed of roses!
Q8: I have obtained a loan for a property recently
bought. This said property has been rented out and
provides me an income of RM1000 per month. My loan
installment is RM950. Would like to find out:
1. Can bank mortgage interest be deducted in my
personal income tax?
2. What is the maximum amount (as in RM) that is
allowed for deduction? What are the criteria required for
a full amount of deduction?
A8: Yes, you can deduct the interest portion of the
mortgage from your income tax – all of it. For example,
if the interest portion is RM900, than you can deduct all
that. There is no other criteria except for the property
must not be the one that you are staying in.
Q9: Would like to have your advice for the followings:
1. Potential tenants
If we as a landlord have collected a down payment
from potential tenant and had agreed verbally to rent the
property out to them. However, at a later stage we realize
that they are not suitable after viewing their application
form. What can we do? Can we just refund them the down
payment without any compensation?
2. Existing tenants
If tenants continue to extend another year contract
after completing two year tenancy now has requested the
landlord to repaint the property. Are we obliged to do so?
Can we charge them the cost for the painting?
A9: 1. It depends on the agreement. Normally we would
refund their deposit and move on. If they not happy
about it, they may decide to take legal action against
you, but it takes too long, too expensive and too much
trouble. Weigh the risks and decide intelligently.
2. No, you are obliged to repaint the property
(especially if it is not in the tenancy agreement).
However, you may want to do so to maintain the appearance
(and value) of your property. Perhaps both of you (landlord
and tenant) can share the cost?
Q10: I have attended your property investment course in
Holiday Villa last year. Herewith I want to share some of
my properties investment portfolio with you.
1. I have two rental apartments in Melaka, one I
rent out to KYM (Kolej Yayasan Melaka) and the other one
to MMU (Multimedia University). Both comes with rental
agreement and managed by rental management companies.
Both are giving me a positive cash flow.
2. I also have bought one condominium in Ulu Langat
with 25 years rental contract. The contract has been legally
stamp. What should I do to ensure that the developer
fulfill their obligation to pay the rental to me for the
next 25 years? Can any legal action been taken if they do
not fulfill any of the terms in the agreement?
A10: 1. Good for you. Way to go!
2. There is nothing you can do except for taking
legal action should the other party fail to fulfill their
side of the bargain.
Oh wait, yes! There is one alternative - sell the darn property!
PS: More readers have written in to inquire about Capital
Allowance (mentioned in "How to Become a Property
Millionaire"). Since it is such a hot topic, I have
prepared a brief explanation on it, which is now on my
website. This ought to satisfy curious souls out there.
Please click on
http://www.millionairesplanet.com/art045.html
------------------------------------------------------------
2. QUOTE OF THE MONTH
------------------------------------------------------------
"The only thing that stands between a man and what
he wants from life is often merely the will to try
it and the faith to believe that it is possible."
* Richard M. DeVos *
------------------------------------------------------------
3. YOUR QUESTION ANSWERED
------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Not too long ago, I came across your book entitled "How
to become a Millionaire Landlord". After reading it, a spark
lit the fire to my quest for knowledge about the world
finance and earning money. I soon grabbed hold of another
book of yours, "Millionaires are From a Different Planet".
This book has educated me on personal finance.
After reading your profile, I was very much encouraged, not
just by your success in personal finances, but that you are
a pilot. You have become my role model. What I understand
from your profile is that you are a pilot, already have an
MBA from University of Bath, and most of all, and are in
control of your finance.
What I am particularly interested in is how you did all that?
A: Whatever you really, really, really, really, really wants
in life… you will do whatever it takes to get it. That's
how I always get what I want in my life. That's how anybody
who's anybody ever got anything in their lives.
Now what is it hat you really (10x) want in your life?
* HOT TIP *
Read "Die Broke"
by Stephen Pollan and Mark Levine
------------------------------------------------------------
4. SPECIAL OFFERS: Property Seminar
------------------------------------------------------------
Last call for the *number 1* property seminar in Malaysia.
Title: How to MAKE A MILLION from property investment
Date: Sat 11th Dec 2004
Time: 9 am - 6 pm
Venue: Holiday Villa, Subang Jaya
Click here to find out how you can benefit from the real
estate revolution.
http://www.millionairesplanet.com/events.html
PS: Each pax will receive a complimentary copy of Azizi's
latest best seller "How to Become a Property Millionaire".
------------------------------------------------------------
5. NEW BOOKS FROM AZIZI ALI
------------------------------------------------------------
Azizi's latest book "mXe! five keys to become an Extreme
Millionaire" will be out soon. As the title suggests, this
book is about how you can get to be a millionaire as
quickly as possible while doing the things that you love.
If you have benefited from Azizi's previous books, then you
will no doubt love this latest offering. You will find gems
inside this book, which include Azizi's own secret of
success and formula of living life.
This book is due to be published in Feb 2005. However, you
can place your order now and be the first to get this storm.
For more details, please click on:
http://www.millionairesplanet.com/pro.html
------------------------------------------------------------
6. DISCLAIMERS
------------------------------------------------------------
This e-zine is for educational purposes only. The author and
publisher specifically disclaim any responsibility for any
liability, loss or risk, personal or otherwise, which is
incurred as a consequence, directly or indirectly, of the
use and application of any of the contents of this e-zine.
------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright 2004 Azizi Ali
All rights reserved
------------------------------------------------------------
Azizi Ali
True Wealth Sdn Bhd
email: info@millionairesplanet.com
website: www.millionairesplanet.com
tel: 03-7880 1051
fax: 03-7880 8051
Monday, December 06, 2004
The top 10 myths of divorce
1. Half of all marriages end in divorce.
That may have been the case several decades ago, but the divorce rate has been dropping since the early 1980s. If today's divorce rate continues unchanged into the future, the chances that a marriage contracted this year will end in divorce before one partner dies has been estimated to be between 40 and 45 percent.
2. Because people learn from their bad experiences, second marriages tend to be more successful than first marriages.
Although many people who divorce have successful subsequent marriages, the divorce rate of remarriages is in fact higher than that of first marriages.
3. Living together before marriage is a good way to reduce the chances of eventually divorcing.
Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage have a considerably higher chance of eventually divorcing. The reasons for this are not well understood. In part, the type of people who are willing to cohabit may also be those who are more willing to divorce. There is some evidence that the act of cohabitation itself generates attitudes in people that are more conducive to divorce, for example the attitude that relationships are temporary and easily can be ended.
4. Divorce may cause problems for many of the children who are affected by it, but by and large these problems are not long lasting and the children recover relatively quickly.
Divorce increases the risk of interpersonal problems in children. There is evidence, both from small qualitative studies and from large-scale, long-term empirical studies, that many of these problems are long lasting. In fact, they may even become worse in adulthood.
5. Having a child together will help a couple to improve their marital satisfaction and prevent a divorce.
Many studies have shown that the most stressful time in a marriage is after the first child is born. Couples who have a child together have a slightly decreased risk of divorce compared to couples without children, but the decreased risk is far less than it used to be when parents with marital problems were more likely to stay together "for the sake of the children."
6. Following divorce, the woman's standard of living plummets by 73 percent while that of the man's improves by 42 percent.
This dramatic inequity, one of the most widely publicized statistics from the social sciences, was later found to be based on a faulty calculation. A reanalysis of the data determined that the woman's loss was 27 percent while the man's gain was 10 percent. Irrespective of the magnitude of the differences, the gender gap is real and seems not to have narrowed much in recent decades.
7. When parents don't get along, children are better off if their parents divorce than if they stay together.
A recent large-scale, long-term study suggests otherwise. While it found that parents' marital unhappiness and discord have a broad negative impact on virtually every dimension of their children's well-being, so does the fact of going through a divorce. In examining the negative impacts on children more closely, the study discovered that it was only the children in very high conflict homes who benefited from the conflict removal that divorce may bring. In lower-conflict marriages that end in divorce ~ and the study found that perhaps as many as two thirds of the divorces were of this type ~ the situation of the children was made much worse following a divorce. Based on the findings of this study, therefore, except in the minority of high-conflict marriages it is better for the children if their parents stay together and work out their problems than if they divorce.
8. Because they are more cautious in entering marital relationships and also have a strong determination to avoid the possibility of divorce, children who grow up in a home broken by divorce tend to have as much success in their own marriages as those from intact homes.
Marriages of the children of divorce actually have a much higher rate of divorce than the marriages of children from intact families. A major reason for this, according to a recent study, is that children learn about marital commitment or permanence by observing their parents. In the children of divorce, the sense of commitment to a lifelong marriage has been undermined.
9. Following divorce, the children involved are better off in stepfamilies than in single-parent families.
The evidence suggests that stepfamilies are no improvement over single-parent families, even though typically income levels are higher and there is a father figure in the home. Stepfamilies tend to have their own set of problems, including interpersonal conflicts with new parent figures and a very high risk of family breakup.
10. Being very unhappy at certain points in a marriage is a good sign that the marriage will eventually end in divorce.
All marriages have their ups and downs. Recent research using a large national sample found that eighty six percent of people who were unhappily married in the late 1980s, and stayed with the marriage, indicated when interviewed five years later that they were happier. Indeed, three fifths of the formerly unhappily married couples rated their marriages as either "very happy" or "quite happy."
Additional Myths:
It is usually men who initiate divorce proceedings.
Two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women. One recent study found that many of the reasons for this have to do with the nature of our divorce laws. For example, in most states women have a good
chance of receiving custody of their children. Because women more strongly want to keep their children with them, in states where there is a presumption of shared custody with the husband the percentage of
women who initiate divorces is much lower.
Also, the higher rate of women initiators is probably due to the fact that men are more likely to be "badly behaved." Husbands, for example, are more likely than wives to have problems with drinking, drug abuse,
and infidelity.
That may have been the case several decades ago, but the divorce rate has been dropping since the early 1980s. If today's divorce rate continues unchanged into the future, the chances that a marriage contracted this year will end in divorce before one partner dies has been estimated to be between 40 and 45 percent.
2. Because people learn from their bad experiences, second marriages tend to be more successful than first marriages.
Although many people who divorce have successful subsequent marriages, the divorce rate of remarriages is in fact higher than that of first marriages.
3. Living together before marriage is a good way to reduce the chances of eventually divorcing.
Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage have a considerably higher chance of eventually divorcing. The reasons for this are not well understood. In part, the type of people who are willing to cohabit may also be those who are more willing to divorce. There is some evidence that the act of cohabitation itself generates attitudes in people that are more conducive to divorce, for example the attitude that relationships are temporary and easily can be ended.
4. Divorce may cause problems for many of the children who are affected by it, but by and large these problems are not long lasting and the children recover relatively quickly.
Divorce increases the risk of interpersonal problems in children. There is evidence, both from small qualitative studies and from large-scale, long-term empirical studies, that many of these problems are long lasting. In fact, they may even become worse in adulthood.
5. Having a child together will help a couple to improve their marital satisfaction and prevent a divorce.
Many studies have shown that the most stressful time in a marriage is after the first child is born. Couples who have a child together have a slightly decreased risk of divorce compared to couples without children, but the decreased risk is far less than it used to be when parents with marital problems were more likely to stay together "for the sake of the children."
6. Following divorce, the woman's standard of living plummets by 73 percent while that of the man's improves by 42 percent.
This dramatic inequity, one of the most widely publicized statistics from the social sciences, was later found to be based on a faulty calculation. A reanalysis of the data determined that the woman's loss was 27 percent while the man's gain was 10 percent. Irrespective of the magnitude of the differences, the gender gap is real and seems not to have narrowed much in recent decades.
7. When parents don't get along, children are better off if their parents divorce than if they stay together.
A recent large-scale, long-term study suggests otherwise. While it found that parents' marital unhappiness and discord have a broad negative impact on virtually every dimension of their children's well-being, so does the fact of going through a divorce. In examining the negative impacts on children more closely, the study discovered that it was only the children in very high conflict homes who benefited from the conflict removal that divorce may bring. In lower-conflict marriages that end in divorce ~ and the study found that perhaps as many as two thirds of the divorces were of this type ~ the situation of the children was made much worse following a divorce. Based on the findings of this study, therefore, except in the minority of high-conflict marriages it is better for the children if their parents stay together and work out their problems than if they divorce.
8. Because they are more cautious in entering marital relationships and also have a strong determination to avoid the possibility of divorce, children who grow up in a home broken by divorce tend to have as much success in their own marriages as those from intact homes.
Marriages of the children of divorce actually have a much higher rate of divorce than the marriages of children from intact families. A major reason for this, according to a recent study, is that children learn about marital commitment or permanence by observing their parents. In the children of divorce, the sense of commitment to a lifelong marriage has been undermined.
9. Following divorce, the children involved are better off in stepfamilies than in single-parent families.
The evidence suggests that stepfamilies are no improvement over single-parent families, even though typically income levels are higher and there is a father figure in the home. Stepfamilies tend to have their own set of problems, including interpersonal conflicts with new parent figures and a very high risk of family breakup.
10. Being very unhappy at certain points in a marriage is a good sign that the marriage will eventually end in divorce.
All marriages have their ups and downs. Recent research using a large national sample found that eighty six percent of people who were unhappily married in the late 1980s, and stayed with the marriage, indicated when interviewed five years later that they were happier. Indeed, three fifths of the formerly unhappily married couples rated their marriages as either "very happy" or "quite happy."
Additional Myths:
It is usually men who initiate divorce proceedings.
Two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women. One recent study found that many of the reasons for this have to do with the nature of our divorce laws. For example, in most states women have a good
chance of receiving custody of their children. Because women more strongly want to keep their children with them, in states where there is a presumption of shared custody with the husband the percentage of
women who initiate divorces is much lower.
Also, the higher rate of women initiators is probably due to the fact that men are more likely to be "badly behaved." Husbands, for example, are more likely than wives to have problems with drinking, drug abuse,
and infidelity.
The Top Ten Myths of Marriage
by David Popenoe
1. Marriage benefits men much more than women.
Contrary to earlier and widely publicized reports, recent research
finds men and women to benefit about equally from marriage, although
in different ways. Both men and women live longer, happier, healthier
and wealthier lives when they are married. Husbands typically gain
greater health benefits while wives gain greater financial advantages.
2. Having children typically brings a married couple closer together
and increases marital happiness.
Many studies have shown that the arrival of the first baby commonly
has the effect of pushing the mother and father farther apart, and
bringing stress to the marriage. However, couples with children have a
slightly lower rate of divorce than childless couples.
3. The keys to long-term marital success are good luck and romantic love.
Rather than luck and love, the most common reasons couples give for
their long-term marital success are commitment and companionship. They
define their marriage as a creation that has taken hard work,
dedication and commitment (to each other and to the institution of
marriage). The happiest couples are friends who share lives and are
compatible in interests and values.
4. The more educated a woman becomes, the lower are her chances of
getting married.
A recent study based on marriage rates in the mid-1990s concluded that
today's women college graduates are more likely to marry than their
non-college peers, despite their older age at first marriage. This is
a change from the past, when women with more
education were less likely to marry.
5. Couples who live together before marriage, and are thus able to
test how well suited they are for each other, have more satisfying and
longer-lasting marriages than couples who do not.
Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage
have less satisfying marriages and a considerably higher chance of
eventually breaking up. One reason is that people who cohabit may be
more skittish of commitment and more likely to call it quits when
problems arise. But in addition, the very act of living together may
lead to attitudes that make happy marriages more difficult. The
findings of one recent study, for example, suggest "there may be less
motivation for cohabiting partners to develop their conflict
resolution and support skills." (One important exception: cohabiting
couples who are already planning to marry each other in the near
future have just as good a chance at staying together as couples who
don't live together before marriage).
6. People can't be expected to stay in a marriage for a lifetime as
they did in the past because we live so much longer today.
Unless our comparison goes back a hundred years, there is no basis for
this belief. The enormous increase in longevity is due mainly to a
steep reduction in infant mortality. And while adults today can expect
to live a little longer than their grandparents, they also marry at a
later age. The life span of a typical, divorce-free marriage,
therefore, has not changed much in the past fifty years. Also, many
couples call it quits long before they get to a significant
anniversary: half of all divorces take place by the seventh year of a
marriage.
7. Marrying puts a woman at greater risk of domestic violence than if
she remains single.
Contrary to the proposition that for men "a marriage licence is a
hitting licence," a large body of research shows that being unmarried
~ and especially living with a man outside of marriage ~ is associated
with a considerably higher risk of domestic violence for women. One
reason for this finding is that married women may significantly
underreport domestic violence. Further, women are less likely to marry
and more likely to divorce a man who is violent. Yet it is probably
also the case that married men are less likely to commit domestic
violence because they are more invested in their wives' wellbeing, and
more integrated into the extended family and community. These social
forces seem to help check men's violent behaviour.
8. Married people have less satisfying sex lives, and less sex, than
single people.
According to a large-scale national study, married people have both
more and better sex than do their unmarried counterparts. Not only do
they have sex more often but they enjoy it more, both physically and
emotionally.
9. Cohabitation is just like marriage, but without "the piece of paper."
Cohabitation typically does not bring the benefits ~ in physical
health, wealth, and emotional wellbeing ~ that marriage does. In terms
of these benefits cohabitants in the United States more closely
resemble singles than married couples. This is due, in part, to the
fact that cohabitants tend not to be as committed as married couples,
and they are more oriented toward their own personal autonomy and less
to the wellbeing of their partner.
10. Because of the high divorce rate, which weeds out the unhappy
marriages, people who stay married have happier marriages than people
did in the past when everyone stuck it out, no matter how bad the
marriage.
According to what people have reported in several large national
surveys, the general level of happiness in marriages has not increased
and probably has declined slightly. Some studies have found in recent
marriages, compared to those of twenty or thirty years ago,
significantly more work-related stress, more marital conflict and less
marital interaction.
1. Marriage benefits men much more than women.
Contrary to earlier and widely publicized reports, recent research
finds men and women to benefit about equally from marriage, although
in different ways. Both men and women live longer, happier, healthier
and wealthier lives when they are married. Husbands typically gain
greater health benefits while wives gain greater financial advantages.
2. Having children typically brings a married couple closer together
and increases marital happiness.
Many studies have shown that the arrival of the first baby commonly
has the effect of pushing the mother and father farther apart, and
bringing stress to the marriage. However, couples with children have a
slightly lower rate of divorce than childless couples.
3. The keys to long-term marital success are good luck and romantic love.
Rather than luck and love, the most common reasons couples give for
their long-term marital success are commitment and companionship. They
define their marriage as a creation that has taken hard work,
dedication and commitment (to each other and to the institution of
marriage). The happiest couples are friends who share lives and are
compatible in interests and values.
4. The more educated a woman becomes, the lower are her chances of
getting married.
A recent study based on marriage rates in the mid-1990s concluded that
today's women college graduates are more likely to marry than their
non-college peers, despite their older age at first marriage. This is
a change from the past, when women with more
education were less likely to marry.
5. Couples who live together before marriage, and are thus able to
test how well suited they are for each other, have more satisfying and
longer-lasting marriages than couples who do not.
Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage
have less satisfying marriages and a considerably higher chance of
eventually breaking up. One reason is that people who cohabit may be
more skittish of commitment and more likely to call it quits when
problems arise. But in addition, the very act of living together may
lead to attitudes that make happy marriages more difficult. The
findings of one recent study, for example, suggest "there may be less
motivation for cohabiting partners to develop their conflict
resolution and support skills." (One important exception: cohabiting
couples who are already planning to marry each other in the near
future have just as good a chance at staying together as couples who
don't live together before marriage).
6. People can't be expected to stay in a marriage for a lifetime as
they did in the past because we live so much longer today.
Unless our comparison goes back a hundred years, there is no basis for
this belief. The enormous increase in longevity is due mainly to a
steep reduction in infant mortality. And while adults today can expect
to live a little longer than their grandparents, they also marry at a
later age. The life span of a typical, divorce-free marriage,
therefore, has not changed much in the past fifty years. Also, many
couples call it quits long before they get to a significant
anniversary: half of all divorces take place by the seventh year of a
marriage.
7. Marrying puts a woman at greater risk of domestic violence than if
she remains single.
Contrary to the proposition that for men "a marriage licence is a
hitting licence," a large body of research shows that being unmarried
~ and especially living with a man outside of marriage ~ is associated
with a considerably higher risk of domestic violence for women. One
reason for this finding is that married women may significantly
underreport domestic violence. Further, women are less likely to marry
and more likely to divorce a man who is violent. Yet it is probably
also the case that married men are less likely to commit domestic
violence because they are more invested in their wives' wellbeing, and
more integrated into the extended family and community. These social
forces seem to help check men's violent behaviour.
8. Married people have less satisfying sex lives, and less sex, than
single people.
According to a large-scale national study, married people have both
more and better sex than do their unmarried counterparts. Not only do
they have sex more often but they enjoy it more, both physically and
emotionally.
9. Cohabitation is just like marriage, but without "the piece of paper."
Cohabitation typically does not bring the benefits ~ in physical
health, wealth, and emotional wellbeing ~ that marriage does. In terms
of these benefits cohabitants in the United States more closely
resemble singles than married couples. This is due, in part, to the
fact that cohabitants tend not to be as committed as married couples,
and they are more oriented toward their own personal autonomy and less
to the wellbeing of their partner.
10. Because of the high divorce rate, which weeds out the unhappy
marriages, people who stay married have happier marriages than people
did in the past when everyone stuck it out, no matter how bad the
marriage.
According to what people have reported in several large national
surveys, the general level of happiness in marriages has not increased
and probably has declined slightly. Some studies have found in recent
marriages, compared to those of twenty or thirty years ago,
significantly more work-related stress, more marital conflict and less
marital interaction.
Of Like and Love...
In front of the person you love, winter seems like spring.
But in front of the person you like, winter is just beautiful winter.
If you look into the eyes of the one you like, you blush.
But if you look into the eyes of the one you love, you smile.
In front of the person you like, you can't say everything on your mind.
But in front of the person you love, you can.
In front of the person you like, you tend to get shy.
But in front of the person you love, you can show your own self.
You can't look straight into the eyes of the one you like.
But you can always smile and stare into the eyes of the one you love.
But in front of the person you like, winter is just beautiful winter.
If you look into the eyes of the one you like, you blush.
But if you look into the eyes of the one you love, you smile.
In front of the person you like, you can't say everything on your mind.
But in front of the person you love, you can.
In front of the person you like, you tend to get shy.
But in front of the person you love, you can show your own self.
You can't look straight into the eyes of the one you like.
But you can always smile and stare into the eyes of the one you love.
Saturday, December 04, 2004
How to Lose Weight...
Hi, Azlan Adnan
Finally got it... I found a compelling reason to lose weight. I've been stubborn in getting my eyes checked... you've guessed it... All my family members needs corrective eyewear... I have been asked time and time again to have my eyes checked as I have been seen squinting more lately... I always thought - as long as I can see, I'm ok. I'm the one that does not need a laser pointer in meetings because I'll be only 3 feet away from the projection screen... (heck, even my boss has reprimanded me for not taking serious care of my eyesight)
Then one week back into work from the Raya holidays - I had headaches everyday - so... I went & had them made... my first pair of glasses... at 32 Was advised I have no shortsightedness - just really bad astigmatism.. Just picked up the glasses last night - I can see fine lines now...
Got home, took a shower, got out of the bathroom and thought I'll try on the glasses... turned to the full length mirror and ARGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I no longer feel ok about how I look naked... or clothed for that matter...
ai-ya-ya, I have been seeing the world in soft focused vision! Maybe that's the reason I have always preferred blurred lines rather than solid ones... whatever... I was not in denial, I was just plain blind
for goodness sakes! so... If you were so kind to share some of your secrets on losing weight... I'd be much obliged... I told my sister what I've just discovered...
I think she is still rolling on the floor laughing out loud... this morning...
"New Vision"
Dear "New Vision"
The best book I've read about losing weight is "The Thin Book by the Formerly Fat Psychiatrist," unfortunately now out of print.
The basic principle. calorie in less than calorie out.
How do we accomplish this?
Start exercising. Sweat at least 20 minutes a day. You can do whatever exercise you like as long as you enjoy it and sweat for 20 minutes EVERY day. Don't start on a 3 hr run and collapse when you get home and not exercise again for a week. The concept is each and every day, calorie in less than calorie out. Got it?
When you are ready, increase your sweating to 30 minutes a day. when you make the change doesn't matter ~ a week, a month, whenever. As long as you FEEL ready and don't slack back to 20 minutes. Once you go for 30 minutes for sweating a day, keep it at 30! Remember exercise that doesn't produce sweat doesn't count!
You have to change the way you see food. No more makan from pinggan with nasi and lauk on other dishes.
Get a big plate. Put everything you intend to eat for the meal on that plate. And I mean everything - nasi, lauk, ulam, sambal, sayur, ikan, telur masin, whatever. (Only exceptions are fruits ~ you can eat as much fruit as you like as long as it's not durian lah)
Eat your meal slowly. Savour every bite. Enjoy it thoroughly. At the end of the meal, you are faced with 2 scenarios:
1) everything on the plate finished but you still hungry and want to eat more. SORRY! No way. Wait for next meal. Load up your plate more this time. Learn from the mistake at the last meal.
2) You dah kenyang but ada lagi food on your plate. Learn to adjust what you put on your plate. Put less for next meal.
Actually visualize how much you need to eat for a meal. With practice, you akan ambil cukup2 untuk for the meal. Then when you want to eat less, you can adjust accordingly.
remember calorie in less than calorie out.
So next strategy. Eat less calories. How do you do this without feeling hungry? Simple. Eat high-fibre, low calorie foods.
More fruits and vege. Less carbo, less protein and even less fat.
Visualise you are what you eat. At each meal time, look (no, stare) at your plate and imagine the food you are about to eat becoming part of you. Do you want the lemak in the perut lembu to clog up your arteries? Or do you want the vitamins, enzymes and goodness of fruits and veg to make you healthy? Then eat your meal. Slowly, savour and enjoy every bite.
Develop aversions. Look at fatty food, unhealthy food, fats, cake, chocolate, whatever. You at it until you can see how it will destroy your body, your looks. Feel a distaste and disgust for these foods. Feel the aversion when you put these foods in your mouth. You will stop eating these poisons.
5 Deadly White Sins
Cut down or eliminate these foods:
White Sugar - substitute with raw, unprocessed complex sugars like honey, dates
White Rice - start eating more chappati
White Flour - eat brown bread, chappati, no more roti chanai or tosai
Salt, bad for high blood pressure
Milk, too much hormones and antibiotics in farming nowadays. These stuff will poison our body.
Okaylah. I'll give you more only if you feel you can commit to the above. If cannot, no point I give you more tips.
--
Azlan Adnan, MA International Business and Management
H/P: +60 12-383 1324
Fax: +60 3-2032 1128
E-mail: azlan088@gmail.com
http://www.geocities.com/azlan088
http://azlanadnan.blogspot.com
http://www.lulu.com/azlan
Finally got it... I found a compelling reason to lose weight. I've been stubborn in getting my eyes checked... you've guessed it... All my family members needs corrective eyewear... I have been asked time and time again to have my eyes checked as I have been seen squinting more lately... I always thought - as long as I can see, I'm ok. I'm the one that does not need a laser pointer in meetings because I'll be only 3 feet away from the projection screen... (heck, even my boss has reprimanded me for not taking serious care of my eyesight)
Then one week back into work from the Raya holidays - I had headaches everyday - so... I went & had them made... my first pair of glasses... at 32 Was advised I have no shortsightedness - just really bad astigmatism.. Just picked up the glasses last night - I can see fine lines now...
Got home, took a shower, got out of the bathroom and thought I'll try on the glasses... turned to the full length mirror and ARGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I no longer feel ok about how I look naked... or clothed for that matter...
ai-ya-ya, I have been seeing the world in soft focused vision! Maybe that's the reason I have always preferred blurred lines rather than solid ones... whatever... I was not in denial, I was just plain blind
for goodness sakes! so... If you were so kind to share some of your secrets on losing weight... I'd be much obliged... I told my sister what I've just discovered...
I think she is still rolling on the floor laughing out loud... this morning...
"New Vision"
Dear "New Vision"
The best book I've read about losing weight is "The Thin Book by the Formerly Fat Psychiatrist," unfortunately now out of print.
The basic principle. calorie in less than calorie out.
How do we accomplish this?
Start exercising. Sweat at least 20 minutes a day. You can do whatever exercise you like as long as you enjoy it and sweat for 20 minutes EVERY day. Don't start on a 3 hr run and collapse when you get home and not exercise again for a week. The concept is each and every day, calorie in less than calorie out. Got it?
When you are ready, increase your sweating to 30 minutes a day. when you make the change doesn't matter ~ a week, a month, whenever. As long as you FEEL ready and don't slack back to 20 minutes. Once you go for 30 minutes for sweating a day, keep it at 30! Remember exercise that doesn't produce sweat doesn't count!
You have to change the way you see food. No more makan from pinggan with nasi and lauk on other dishes.
Get a big plate. Put everything you intend to eat for the meal on that plate. And I mean everything - nasi, lauk, ulam, sambal, sayur, ikan, telur masin, whatever. (Only exceptions are fruits ~ you can eat as much fruit as you like as long as it's not durian lah)
Eat your meal slowly. Savour every bite. Enjoy it thoroughly. At the end of the meal, you are faced with 2 scenarios:
1) everything on the plate finished but you still hungry and want to eat more. SORRY! No way. Wait for next meal. Load up your plate more this time. Learn from the mistake at the last meal.
2) You dah kenyang but ada lagi food on your plate. Learn to adjust what you put on your plate. Put less for next meal.
Actually visualize how much you need to eat for a meal. With practice, you akan ambil cukup2 untuk for the meal. Then when you want to eat less, you can adjust accordingly.
remember calorie in less than calorie out.
So next strategy. Eat less calories. How do you do this without feeling hungry? Simple. Eat high-fibre, low calorie foods.
More fruits and vege. Less carbo, less protein and even less fat.
Visualise you are what you eat. At each meal time, look (no, stare) at your plate and imagine the food you are about to eat becoming part of you. Do you want the lemak in the perut lembu to clog up your arteries? Or do you want the vitamins, enzymes and goodness of fruits and veg to make you healthy? Then eat your meal. Slowly, savour and enjoy every bite.
Develop aversions. Look at fatty food, unhealthy food, fats, cake, chocolate, whatever. You at it until you can see how it will destroy your body, your looks. Feel a distaste and disgust for these foods. Feel the aversion when you put these foods in your mouth. You will stop eating these poisons.
5 Deadly White Sins
Cut down or eliminate these foods:
White Sugar - substitute with raw, unprocessed complex sugars like honey, dates
White Rice - start eating more chappati
White Flour - eat brown bread, chappati, no more roti chanai or tosai
Salt, bad for high blood pressure
Milk, too much hormones and antibiotics in farming nowadays. These stuff will poison our body.
Okaylah. I'll give you more only if you feel you can commit to the above. If cannot, no point I give you more tips.
--
Azlan Adnan, MA International Business and Management
H/P: +60 12-383 1324
Fax: +60 3-2032 1128
E-mail: azlan088@gmail.com
http://www.geocities.com/azlan088
http://azlanadnan.blogspot.com
http://www.lulu.com/azlan
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